The Women of Advent: Tamar

Gail Wallace


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Tamar Background

Women-of-Advent_Tamar copyright

The fourth Sunday before Christmas Day marks the beginning of Advent. In this series we look at the women in Christ’s lineage: Tamar, Rahab, RuthBathsheba, and Mary.

The family tree of Jesus Christ, David’s son, Abraham’s son: Abraham had Isaac, Isaac had Jacob, Jacob had Judah and his brothers, Judah had Perez and Zerah (the mother was Tamar)” (Matthew 1:1-6)

Tamar is the first woman mentioned in the genealogy of Jesus recorded in Matthew 1:1-17.

Her story is sandwiched in between the story of Joseph (of many-colored coat fame) being sold into slavery by his brothers in Genesis 37, and his encounter with Potiphar’s wife in Genesis 39. Tamar’s actions ensured the continuation of the line of Judah from which Jesus, the “Lion of Judah”, would come. The complete biblical account is recorded in Genesis 38.

When the story starts Judah, (one of Joseph’s older brothers) has left his father’s house and put down roots elsewhere, marrying a Canaanite woman who bears him three sons. Tamar marries Judah’s oldest son, Er, who so grievously offended God that God took his life before any children were born to the couple. In this circumstance, according to Near Eastern law and custom, the next-born son is obligated to marry the widow and serve as a surrogate so that she will have an heir.So Tamar is then married to Judah’s second son, Onan, but this son spurns his marital obligations and also dies at the hand of the Lord.2

At this point, Judah looks for a way out of his obligation to Tamar.

There is one more son, but he is too young to marry. It would have been acceptable for Judah to serve as a surrogate.  But rather than recognizing that his sons’ deaths are the consequence of their own choices, Judah blames Tamar. He is not willing to take the risk that he or his remaining son might fall prey to the same fate.

Judah goes against custom and sends Tamar to live as a widow in her father’s house. As time passes, Tamar realizes Judah is not going to do the right thing. In fact, he has chosen not to act at all, making no provisions for her future. His action restricts her from marrying again and puts his own family in danger of extinction. In those days women had no legal recourse when the men who controlled their destiny chose to mistreat them, and so Tamar is faced with a serious choice: submit to Judah’s authority or come up with a way to conceive within his family.

Here’s where things get interesting; even scandalous to Western eyes.

Tamar comes up with a plan to get Judah to sleep with her in hopes of getting pregnant. She disguises herself so that he mistakes her for a prostitute, he propositions her, and she conceives. (No wonder so many preachers skip over this chapter when teaching Genesis!)

Before he leaves, she asks for a token of good faith until he returns with payment for her “services”, and he hands over his signet, cord, and staff. This would be the Near Eastern equivalent of legal identification by today’s standards, and this evidence will later prove her innocence, saving her life and the lives of the twin boys just conceived.

When it becomes obvious that Tamar is pregnant, Judah is incensed at the shame brought upon his family and calls for her to be burned.  When Tamar sends him the seal and staff, he realizes what has happened and admits that he is the father.  Not only that, Judah praises Tamar for her actions:

The climax of the story comes with Judah’s shocked and humbled response: ‘She is more righteous than I” (v. 26). Tamar has acted out of the highest motives by having a child within the family of Judah. She has honored the demands of her relationship with her deceased husband, whereas Judah has not. By taking unconventional risks and humbling herself in order to hold Judah accountable, she is judged more honorable and maintains the line of Judah.”3

“From Judah will come the cornerstone.” Zechariah 10:4a

Tamar’s actions are often characterized as adultery, revenge, or common prostitution. But understanding the laws and customs of the time can help us more accurately interpret the scene. By Israelite standards, Tamar was justified in her attempt to get Judah to carry out the responsibility he had dodged. He had unfairly deprived her of children, an inheritance, and the opportunity to remarry. His actions threatened God’s plans for the nation of Israel.

John Wesley writes:

She believed the promise made to Abraham and his seed, particularly that of the Messiah, and that she was therefore desirous to have a child by one of that family, that she might have the honour, or at least stand fair for the honour of being the mother of the Messiah.”4

Tamar gives birth to twins, and both are named in the genealogy of Jesus (Matthew 1:3).

When the narrative resumes, Judah has returned to his family and changed his ways.

Jewish scholar Frymer-Kensky writes:

[Tamar’s] boldness, initiative, and willingness to defy society’s expectations have enabled God to provide Judah with two new sons after the death of his first two sons.

By continuing to consider herself a member of Judah’s family and insisting on securing her own future within its parameters, she has made it possible for that family to thrive and develop into a major tribe and eventually the Judean state…

Tamar passes from the scene, but her impact continues…the woman who transformed the history of the kingdom of Judah also transformed Judah himself…the rest of Genesis shows him back in Jacob’s family. He had betrayed Joseph out of jealousy, but he henceforth acts out of loyalty to his brother Benjamin and his father, and is willing to stand up to the Egyptians in order to ensure their safety…”5

After a dangerous detour, the house of Judah aligns once more with God’s purposes.

Lord, in this advent season, give us the courage and strength of Tamar.


1. Note: Levirate law protected a widow by giving her every opportunity to bear a son, and to have a family of her own. Another option was to release her from any obligation to the family so that she could remarry.
2. Note: His motivation was most likely greed since any heir produced by his union with Tamar would inherit half of the father’s estate.
3. Binz, S.J. (2011). Women of the Torah: Matriarchs and Heroes of Israel. Brazos Press, Baker Publishing Group. Grand Rapids: MI.
4. Wesley, J. (1754-1765) Wesley’s Explanatory Notes Bible Commentary.
5. Frymer-Kensky, T. (2002). Reading the Women of the Bible. Schocken Books, New York.
For more on Tamar and the other Old Testament women in the lineage of Jesus, check out Jewish Women: A Comprehensive Historical Encyclopedia.

Graphic Design by Kate Hickman.


**2018 Update: Watch as our CoFounder Kate preaches on the story of Tamar this Advent season!

Gail Wallace

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  • So if my actions are justified by culture, time, or customs then it’s not sin?

    • Kyla, if you’re referring to Tamar sleeping with her father-in-law for the purpose of producing an heir, this was in keeping with the law of the time. Keep in mind that the story takes place long before Moses receives the Ten Commandments and before the Levitical law was even written down.

      Yet the story indicates that God approved of the levirate – when the second son violated it by “spilling his seed” God kills him, for he is now guilty of incest. (Incest laws were suspended when the levirate was in play.)

      It is interesting that the levirate is incorporated into Levitical law later on, although I remember reading that this changes in Deuteronomy. I provided links to more information on this strange practice in my response to Lisa, below, if you’re interested. But the short answer is that as long as the sex was for the purpose of continuing the family lineage it was not considered sin at this time in history. (Remember that before this Hebrew families actually married within their clan as instructed by God. Makes me glad I wasn’t a woman living during that time!

  • Tamar is so neglected! Thank you for highlighting her this week. She’s a favorite of mine – wise, determined, just — and I’m grateful for the inclusion of this story in the OT and in the Joseph saga, in particular. It’s a key turning point for Judah & eventually for the fate of his family, and thus the entire Hebrew nation. Something in Tamar’s behavior, her righteousness, sparked the same in Judah. He passes Joseph’s character test with flying colors when Benjamin appears to be in danger – he is a new man and a worthy leader of his family. And Tamar is largely responsible, a willing instrument in the overarching story line of salvation history.

    • Diana, I knew I liked the tenacity and loyalty of Tamar but until I did the research for the post I hadn’t realized the significance of the placement of her story and how her actions convicted Judah. The fact that 30 verses, an entire chapter, is dedicated to this story should cause us to pay more attention 🙂

  • Love this piece! This is one of my favorite stories in the Bible.

    • Thanks, Ariel, though I must say it’s a rather strange story to be a favorite 🙂

    • Thanks, Charity. It was hard to do it justice in one fell swoop with all those interesting characters.

  • I am wondering, how we are justified in using Levitical law in the case of Tamar? Was the idea of Levirate a common ANE custom prior to the Levitical laws?

    I do like this post, but unless you can show support for the practice of “raising up an heir” prior to ca, 1200 BC this hermeneutic doesn’t logically follow.

    I hope you don’t think I’m being negative; just thorough.

    • Lisa, thanks for your comment and question. One of the frustrations of writing a blog post is being limited in word count and not being able to explain these things in greater depth. As I understand it, the practice of the levirate did not originate with the Israelites, but was in existence long before Levitical law came into being, practiced by a number of primitive peoples. Apparently Levitical law adopted this practice down the road.

      So the post does not cite Levitical law, just mentions the levirate customs of the Near East. Here are a couple sources with more information on the levirate. Let me know if that answers the question.

      • Thanks! I downloaded that article pdf for later close reading. This is an article that I recognize. And sorry, I realize I saw “Levirate” and read in to it “Levitical”.

        Personally, I think it would be better to increase the word count for the express purpose of giving more detail. (But then again, I’m a philosophy major)

        And again, a good blog…even with the restriction on the word count. 😉

  • I consider Tamar a woman of faithfulness. She understood God’s law and did what she could to fulfill it, despite opposition from her husband’s family.

    It’s interesting too that this story gets sandwiched into Joseph’s story right before he is tempted by Potiphar’s wife. Judah was supposed to have sex with Tamar but went chasing after prostitutes, while Joseph is propositioned by a very powerful woman and yet keeps himself from responding as she wants.

    Tamar is faithful, Joseph is faithful, Judah not so much.

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